How to Overcome Your Fears

“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
What keeps you up at night? A better question is what worries you and what are you afraid of? Do your worries act as a barrier, keeping you from accomplishing all you want in life?
Mark Twain once said, “My life has been filled with calamities, some of which actually happened.”
How true.
Researchers at the University of Cincinnati have found that “fully eight-five percent of what we worry about never happens.  Of the 15% that actually happens a full 79% are able to turn the situation around.”
Still, with even with this telling statistic, many people let their fears stop them from taking the action they need to do things that could prove to be worthwhile or even lucrative.
Where Do Your Fears Come From?
Fear in itself is not a bad thing. In fact, rational fears have helped to keep us alive as a species. So in order to use fear you need to understand it.
Ask yourself, “Why am I afraid? Is this a rational fear?
For example, a fear of snakes is rational, snake bites can kill us. That’s why by the age of two nearly every child is afraid of snakes.
On the other hand a fear of all dogs isn’t rational. That’s because most dogs aren’t that vicious, your mind, because of some past experience, hallucinates that they are.
You have to figure out if your fear is rational. If you find that it isn’t the first thing you need to try to understand why you have such an irrational fear. Is it because you were bit by a dog or a big dog frightened you when you were a child?
If you can’t understand or overcome your fear then seek professional help. You don’t need to have these irrational fears controlling your life.
Your Fears Can Be Empowering
Some people use fear to give them superpowers in emergency situations. When you read the story of the man who pulled a steering wheel away from another man pinned in a car that was on fire, rescuing him from a burning vehicle, the story goes on to say how the rescuers’ said facing his fear of the fire gave him the strength to bend the steering wheel and pull the other man free.
The same goes for you. Just facing your fears can give you the inner strength you need to drive you to do great things and achieve massive success.
Maybe you have a fear of public speaking. If you do, you can face and overcome that fear by joining Toastmasters or taking a class in public speaking.
As you learn to overcome your fears, you can use your successful experiences build your character. The inner strength you gain from facing and overcoming your fears can provide you with the motivation and drive you need to carry you to future successes.
How to Overcome Your Fears
There are a number of ways that you can overcome your fears.
One way to overcome a fear is to confront it head on. If you fear failing in a certain situation, then the only thing to do is to face the fear and beat it.
If you overcome that fear you’ll be motivated to take on another one.
If you fail to overcome your fear the first time, the best thing to do is to regroup and use another way to go about it. Each time you use a new method you learn what works and what doesn’t. Just add what does work the next time around.
Three Ways to Overcome Fears by Taking Your Mind Off of Them
1. Do Something Active Like Exercising
Research has shown that physical activity boosts your immune system while strengthening your mind as well as your body. As you exercise, your mind becomes a drug factory that releases hormones known as endorphins into your body. These hormones help you to feel better and promote a healthier mindset.
At the very least your physical activity can help to take your mind off your worries.
2. Make Goals and Take Action to Achieve Them
While goal setting in itself can help you overcome your fears, taking action will give you the confidence to achieve them.
Each day take the time to set goals and review your progress. As you complete them you’ll build the self -confidence you need to overcome your fears.
3. Talk About Your Fears to Someone You Know and Trust
Fears can turn into monsters if hold them inside you. As these fears build they can become bigger and bigger until they terrify and control you.
Talking about your fears helps you to get a better perspective on them which can help to relieve your worries. This also gives you the opportunity to obtain honest, caring feedback.
Overcome Your Fears = Overcome Your Worries
Worry is a habit. The best thing you can do with this habit is to let go of it. All worry does is move you toward irrational fear.
Earl Nightingale said that we go around in a fog of worries. He gave us this estimate of what most people worry about:
“Things that never happen: 40 percent. That is, 40 percent of the things you worry about will never occur anyway.”
“Things over and past that can’t be changed by all the worry in the world: 30 percent”
“Needless worries about our health: 12 percent.”
“Petty, miscellaneous worries: 10 percent.”
‘Real, legitimate worries: 8 percent. Only 8 percent of your worries are worth concerning yourself about. Ninety-two percent are pure fog with no substance at all.”
(Source: The Essence of Success by Earl Nightingale)
Worrying bogs you down and can make you second guess yourself. Your worry focus can even lead to a self-fulfilling prophecy of failure.
Stop worrying about the 92 percent of things you can’t control. Since you have no control over its outcome, why waste time worrying about it?
Worrying only add to your fears and prevents you from focusing on handling the things you can control.
You Can Overcome Your Fears and Worries
As I learned long ago when taking Psychology 101, you can’t change or control other people, places or things. You can only control yourself. Focus on what you can control.
If it’s a situation you have some control over the best thing to do is to take action. Use the techniques in this article to take your mind off your worries and then get to work and do everything in your power to solve the issue.
By taking action you will begin to focus on solutions instead of your fears and worries.  
In the end, you overcome your fears by facing them head on. As you face them, your experiences will build your self-confidence and make you stronger.
Refuse to be a slave to your fears. You can overcome your fears and lead an exciting and fulfilling life!
By: Will Dieck

Church Attacks: It is High Time the Church Acted!

      

Once again, the emissaries of death in the country, under the auspices of Islamist fundamentalists, Boko Haram, attacked a church, St. Rita’s Catholic Church, Kaduna, on October 28, 2012, just when the Holy Mass was on-going. By the time the dust raised by this bomb explosion settled, a total number of eight innocent Christians, including an unfortunate priest, whose offence was just the choice of their religion and for serving their Creator, were left in the pool of their own blood, losing their lives to yet another activity of the Boko Haram. And the 146 others had a close shave with death or escaped it by the whiskers, were left to take a vacation at the hospital beds, in excruciating agonies, caused by the blast.

Just when Nigerians and the international community were condemning, in strongest terms, the attacks on October 28, 2012, on St. Rita’s Catholic Church, Kaduna, and the victims of the attacks still smarting from its  aftermath, yet, two agents of death, found their way, through the water-tight security of a military formation to   St. Andrew Military Protestant Church, Jaji, killing 11 and injuring 30, according to military authorities but eye witnesses claimed to the contrary, as regard the number of casualties, deprived of their precious souls.

That attack, on the October 28, 2012, came after the September 23, 2012, on yet another Roman Catholic Church-St. John Cathedral, Bauchi. A hell-bound suicide bomber, who took delight in dying for a wrong cause-religious fanaticism, decided to get some hapless Christians as his escorts to heaven. He rammed his Bomb-laden car into the church building and innocent Christians and before anybody could know what was happening three innocent Christians have been killed, with chunks of human flesh littering the environment. Other forty-five injured Christians were rushed to the hospital.

In these repeated attacks on God’s holy place, that has over the years, in Nigeria, turned into a slaughter slab-cathedral that is earlier known to be a safe and holy place has been turned into a burial ground of sorts, where bodies of innocent Christians, are buried in rubbles. Each time (they strike),they left ,in their trail, several agonies ,losses of human precious lives and destruction of hard-earned property, that cause the bereaved and the  victims everlasting sadness. One most disturbing things about these devilish attacks is that they follow the same pattern-ramming the vehicles on church building and sporadic shootings of every thing on sight.

For too long now, the Christendom in Nigeria, had remained too silent and grossly inactive, hoping that someday, reason will prevail and that governments-will on their own, rise against these inhuman and barbaric attacks against the church. That government will compensate or alleviate the agonies of the victims and the bereaved families and rebuild those demolished church building, home and lives.

In March, 2010, clashes killed no fewer than 200 people, the majority of whom were Christians. In similar clash, in 2008, more than 300 were killed. The grievous of all these was the December 25, 2011, Christmas Day attacks on five churches across the country on the same day. The worst of all the five coordinated attacks was the bombing of St. Theresa Catholic Church, Madalla, Suleja, Niger State. Their offence- for being Christians; for choosing to follow Christ and the agents of death chose to sadden their joy.

Beyond the usual outright verbal and media condemnations, that usually follows, from the powerful and the mighty, from both outside and within the country, what else follow? Does this stop further attacks on Churches? Does it stop Christians from being shot at, right in the church, as it happened recently in Okene, Kogi State? The victims are shortly left to bear the brunt of what they know nothing about. They are often left in the lurch, left to fend for themselves and continue life, with no assistance coming from the governments, who, besides picking up the initial medical expenses for the survivors, left them to their fate.

 With the way things are going and Catholic Church becoming a major focus of Boko Haram attacks, one cannot but be forced to ask what offence has the Roman Catholic church in Nigeria committed, to warrant this constant carnages that often take away the lives of  its innocent parishioners. One cannot but be forced to ask why Christians should be frequently killed for what they know nothing about; for what they too, suffer from-bad governance and failed leadership?

In all these attacks, generations have been wiped out. Families had been exterminated. Many lives have been massacred. The worst hit has always been the Church and not the government, the Islamist sect claims they fight.  The Church has watched lives snuffed out of its members, agonizingly. The Church has lost its members, hence depopulation has sent into the Christendom. In Northern Nigeria, Christians are worshipping God in fears-a contravention of the country’s constitutional provisions that gives some freedoms and rights to its citizenry, among which we have these fundamental (human) rights to education, expression and religion. This development has ranked Nigeria, Northern Nigeria, as one of the places in the world, with high persecution of Christians.

For a long time, the relationship between Christians and Muslims have been stained, with the  killings of the Christians becoming the delight of some Islamist extremists .This has become rampant since 1999.The 2010 Jos riots saw clashes between Muslim herders against Christians farmers near the volatile city of Jos, resulting in hundreds of casualties. Officials estimated that 500 people were killed in those nocturnal raids by the rampaging Muslim gangs. Similar subsequent attacks till 2012 had seen lives snuff out of unfortunate Christians whose offence was nothing but their religion. The years 2011 and 2012 have both witnessed various attacks on Christians and church buildings. From December 2011 till date, the countries as well as the entire Christendom, in Nigeria, have lost count of these life-taking attacks and the correct statistics of casualties remain grossly unknown. The shooting spree; an operation shoot-anybody-on-sight at the Deeper life Church, on innocent Christians, right in the heart of their churches was nothing but barbaric.

The most pertinent question, as it appears, the Church is quite being silent on the growing and unabated attacks on the Church is, is it this the way Christians are going to keep their hands in akimbo and watch with gusto fellow Christians being killed? Would we continue to fold our hands and watch, before our very eyes Christians overwhelming population of over 70 million dwindle by the day-with the opposite religion having its population increased in leaps and bounds? We must stand to confront this hydra-headed monster that has chosen to eradicate Christianity, in unison. We must condemn it unanimously, as being indifferent and unconcerned might be too dangerous, as nobody knows who the next victims will be. The Christians/Church leadership has more to do, in this regard. It behooves, urgently on them, to mobilize their followers for a spiritual warfare against the kingdom that stands to eradicate Christianity in Nigeria. CAN, PFN and other numerous Christian organizations should sue the government, for the constant mindless killings of Christians by a Muslim fundamental sect, Boko Haram. That the Church can no longer condone the wanton killings of its innocent Christians. The leadership of the Church should meet with governments, giving the government an ultimatum that if this could repeat itself, there would be a legal action instituted against them.

The constant holy advice from church leadership of no reprisal attacks does not mean stupidity. How would somebody come to one’s house or church wanting to deprive one of one’s souls in an agonizing manner because of one’s religious belief? Christians must protect themselves and beef up security around themselves. Life has no duplicate.

The Church has been grossly indifferent, even in the face of the growing attacks and massacres often carried on it by Boko Haram. Some Christians have been unperturbed about it because it is not happening in a region they consider faraway from them. That it is happening to a particular denomination to which they are members. That it is happening to in a region or part of the country to where they are not residents. Government officials, who are Christians, are rather unconcerned about it because the churches where they worship are well protected, with loads of security men manning them.

One’s region may seem presently immune to these gruesome attacks, purposefully aimed at followers of Christ, it may seen insulated but what about our hapless fellow Christians, who are trapped, by providence, in the midst of these attacks and subsequent ones? What about when we or our relatives travel to these troubled regions for one thing or the other only for one to get killed?

The indifference and nonchalant attitude often assumed by Christian, towards the attacks on the Church and fellow Christians, towards the attacks on the Church and fellow Christians accentuate the growing disunity and lack of love in the Christendom-in a Christendom that has given itself to selfishness, narrow and parochial interests. A Christendom that takes delight in emphasizing doctrines and denominations rather than the emphasis on the Body of Christ as a whole body is also is affected. The unfortunate deaths of those hapless Christian in the North become our grief for two reasons: for being Christians (as we are) and for being human beings like we are, as a Yoruba adage goes:’’ The death that deprived one’s relative of his soul, is invariably sending a warning signal to one, to get ready too, as one may be the next in line’’. For this not to be our lot, the Church –the Christians and its leadership must rise.

While we hail the CAN President, Pastor Ayo Oritsajafor, for his prompt condemnation and attacks on opposing Muslim community, wherever there was Boko Haram attacks, this is far away from solving the problem. One would have expected, owing to constant attacks on Christians and Church, that would not have been left to degenerate to this very sorry state, as tight security measures would have been put in place that would either stop or reduce the damage and loss of lives and prosperity.

The Church’s deafening silence has made the attacks to continue unabatedly. Besides the initial condemnation, what decisive measures are put in place to forestall a recurrence?

The situation where Christians are executed like convicts for no just cause, make mockery of the nation’s justice system. The situation where Christians are killed innocently for serving their Creator, make nonsense of the statutory provision of some civic rights and freedom, as enshrined in the nation’s statute book. The tradition of constant invasions of churches with bomb-laden vehicles that cause a blast that kill and injure many does not project Nigeria as an ideal country. In fact, it shows the country as a country of barbarians and inhumane religious extremists, as it equally projects the nation’s failure of governance and political leadership, on a large scale to the international community, hence the blacklist of the country as a terrorist state.

While we are not in support of reprisals, as this will lead into full-fledge civil war-the objective of these merchants of death, it is, however, advisable, to beef up security, especially the one that would spot or kill any suicide bomber before the damage is done. Government should install bomb-detecting mechanisms, on our major roads, especially where there are speed bumps, with a detachment of law enforcers. The leeway given to Boko Haram, without being tracked down, by driving through the major parts of the cities, to reach their targets successfully, often make mockery of the country’s security system despite huge budgetary allocations. 

Speaking recently, at the just-concluded Holy Congress, Pastor Enoch Adeboye said one morning when he was praying to God to help terrorize those who terrorize His Church. He said God replies him by saying; ‘What is the Church itself doing to terrorize those who rise up against it?

Truly, the Church has been mute for long, watching these attacks lingering on the Church and Christians, without doing anything to curb them. The Church has been quite indifferent. How many denominations have organized special revivals, exclusive open-air crusades and church services to specially pray, against these attacks? How many prayer points have been specially raised among Christians, against those who terrorize the Church for years now? The Church has been trapped to a corner, like a rat; it needs to fight back by the way of bloodless reprisals and resistance. The Church needs to frustrate their diabolical schemes and life-wasting agenda, if not, this will continue. Hence, the Church should rise, in holy anger, to pray, fast and organize special revivals and crusades that will force God to arise and scatter His enemy.

They are never tired because the Church never acted, hence the recurrence. God has not risen against them because Christians have not invited God. It took the groaning of the Israelites for God to rise against their oppressors (Exodus6:5-6). God arose in their case when the Israelites groaned-to tell God they never liked the bondage they were in (Exodus 2:23-24). It also took Hezekiah some weeping and prayers to have God elongate his lifespan (Isaiah 38)

It is when the Church arise; it is when it groans to God, telling Him it never like these deadly attacks that God, whose ears are not deaf, will rise up in His Majesty to fight His battle. Therefore, the Church should rise in unison to call and invoke the destroying wrath of God on the persecutors of His Church.

If they refuse to stop, as they have always, fasting, prayers and vigils should all be organized among the Christian folk to force God to arise and destroy His ene

mies. If the Church refuses to do something, God may never rise to terrorize the enemies of the Church. The battle is not physical; it is spiritual. The battle is not political as we are earlier made to believe; it is religious.

It is high time the Church stood to act promptly, to end this era of blood-letting of the innocent in our churches. The usual and constant blame game between CAN and the Muslims can only achieve only a little. The real issues must be faced and tackled headlong.

It is high time the church denominations arose to partake in this fight by the way of issuing press releases, organizing press briefings and conferences, where they will collectively, and individually make their positions on the constant attacks on Christians known. It is not only CAN, PFN or Catholic Bishop’s Conference and a few other church denominations, should be the only ones doing this. Every church, no matter its status or population, should also issue press releases and address the media, in their own little way. Church denominations and individual Christians can also lend their voices by the way of sponsoring the on-going campaign against Attacks on Christians/Churches in The Christendom Newspaper. This will go a long way in curbing the incessant unholy attacks.

It is high time the Church risen in unison, ignoring their doctrinal/denominational differences, as we are all one in Christ. Anything that happens to one should automatically affect the other. It is by so doing, the cause, welfare, unity and progress of the Church will be speedily advanced.

The time to act is now! The time to wake up from our deep slumber that is making our enemies to keep sowing tares among our wheat is now. This slumber and our prolonged silence have proven to be more destructive. The devil terrorizing the church has not been sleeping; it is frequently on the prowl devouring innocent Christians, then, why should the Church decides to fall into a deep slumber?

This has made the devil to constantly catch the Church unawares and make nonsense of its members. It is high time the Church/Christian acted, to stop this rampaging devil of bomb blasts and unnecessary carnages on our numerous citadels of worship-God’s holy place that forbids the spilling of human precious blood. The time to act is now!

By: Frank Eboye